Very unexpected diagnosis

     Today we made our trek to the A.D.H.D. Doctor.  Thank heavens, we only have to do this once every three months.  We go over health, weight gain for the boys (Robby and Justin), questions, behaviors and anything else that might be a concern.

     For 7 years, I fought with Robby.  Begged, pleaded and cajoled.  Punished, promised and rewarded.  And nothing worked.  In the 9th grade he was getting by with a few d's, interspersed with some c's and f's.  Definitely not every parent's dream.

     I worried endlessly about what kind of a future he could have.  Where he would end up in life with such an educational mountain to scale.  I talked to everyone I knew, trying to get more advice about how I could interest him in his school work.  How I could track his progress, stay on top of his assignments, did I need to home school him (and could I do it without loosing my mind).

    Finally a good friend mentioned that I might want to have him tested for ADHD.  Did I mention that I have a degree in elementary ed?  And that I thought ADHD was a made up disease that really equated to too much sugar, video games and television and not enough parental involvement?  Add to this that Robby has never shown any signs of hyperactivity. 

     Maybe someone had mentioned it to me before.  If so, I had not been willing to listen.  Diagnosis?  ADHD - no hyperactivity involved.  A week on the wonder drug and my life was changed.  Homework was being done AND turned in.  Teachers were praising concentration in school.  Grades flew through the roof.
The child who I had complained so much about had suddenly become a model child.  Fast forward 2 1/2 years - I am soooooo grateful for that diagnosis.  So thankful that there was a way to pull his wandering thoughts down into reality.  Happy beyond belief to see him building computers, running an entire auditorium of lights and sound, wiring together thingamabobs that I can never hope to understand.

     Having learned the lesson with Robby - when Justin began exhibiting the same behaviors in 2nd grade - an inability to focus in our out of the classroom, avoidance behaviors to distract me from the fact that he could NOT do the work, and  poor school work  I knew just what to do.

     I wonder how many years of frustration we could have saved with Robby, had we just known sooner.  I look forward to seeing how great Justin will become without having all the hurdles that his brother had.
     And just when you think you have reached the end of my diatribe.   I told the doctor today that sometimes, as I hopped from one activity to another like a brainless bird, I sometimes wondered if I had ADHD.
     He handed me a piece of paper and as I read it, tears pooled in my eyes.  I remembered the little girl who cried with frustration all through her elementary school years.  The teen that got mostly c's with a few b's interspersed despite spending hours trying to get it right.  The young adult that felt as if she was hanging on to a ledge by her fingernails as she worked to get through college.

     And I wondered.  Could this be right?   Pretty compelling thought when you score on the ADHD side of the line 6 out of 6 times.  This labels ME as an adult with ADHD.    Maybe the test is not conclusive enough.

     But perhaps the overwhelming frustrations I felt at Robby's inability

were only memories of my own