Every other year, we take our children on a “Stowe Lampoon’s Vacation.”.

The purpose of this trip was originally to visit the grandparents that all lived on the east coast. We started with two doting parents and one small baby in an airplane. We flew until we had 3 children. At this point, we decided it might be more affordable to drive.

We have made this drive in a station wagon, in a minivan, in a suburban and finally in a 15 passenger van. We leave Utah and visit. That is our vacation. We make our way across the United States by visiting family in Missouri, Kentucky, North Carolina, South Carolina, Pennsylvania, New York and Vermont. Sounds like fun, right? This monumental drive generally covers 6,000 miles and uses up vast quantities of gas.

Bob is THE DRIVER. He loves to climb in a vehicle and drive for 12 to 20 hours solid. We have to beg to be let out for food, or for bathroom breaks. And heaven forbid we should want to stretch our legs! He would drive forever. This leaves me as THE PARENT. By driving, he gets out of that responsibility. I feel as if I spend a month, shepherding children into and out of the vehicle. Playing travel games with them, trying to soothe tempers that flare in cramped quarters, and making and handing out pb&j sandwiches, chips and fruit snacks.

We have watched movies, played the license plate game, and counted the colors of cars on the road. At one point, we tried to incorporate a little bit of geography into the trip by taping all the major cities we would pass through to the roof of the van. When the kids saw the matching road sign, they were able to get a treat out of the box. Even though Bob does not appreciate our camp fire songs, the younger kids seem to enjoy it though, so we do it anyway.

One of my favorite parts of the trip has been the reward system. Two years ago, we used fake money to purchase treats and small toys. It was fun to see the children scrambling to buckle younger siblings, to empty the garbage at each rest area, and to carry a smaller child into the restroom.

This year promises to be different. This year, we managed to find flights that made the cost of gas look high! We will drive to Denver, park our beast of a van, and fly from there. I can only imagine herding 8 children into the cramped quarters of an airplane. Then trying to get them to all behave while surrounded by dozens of equally cramped people.

But I figure one day of hard travel is MUCH better than the 4 days it generally takes us to get across the country.

Right?????