My new favorite ugly shirt

Admittedly, I stole it. 
  

AND

It is sort of ugly 

I was not even smart enough to steal a new one,

or even one that matched my skin tone,

BUT 

I love it.  Three months now I have had my  Ugly Brown Shirt, and I love it. 

Don't be afraid for me - the guy I stole it off of was not using it anymore.  He'll never even miss it.  

And really?  If I can't find it, there are several others around here I can swipe.  Not as easily, but now that I have fallen in love with 

The Ugly Brown Shirt

I have to wear it.  No matter that it has spots of glue from left over patches.  No matter that it is 4 sizes too big.  

I may never give it back.
 

My Ugly Brown Shirt

My new Ugly Brown Shirt is, in fact Robby's Scout shirt.  He has achieved the rank of Eagle Scout, and flown from our home nest, leaving his shirt behind.  

I received the opportunity three months ago to become a "wolf den assistant" which is a cub scout leader working with the 8 year olds.  I was happy for this opportunity, because it allows me to be with one of my children.  We go together, work together, learn together.  Perhaps I will get to be a Wolf den assistant long enough for my last three boys to go through cubs.  

A girl can dream, can't she?  

Yet with all the excitement of being in cub scouts with my son, I was hesitant each week I donned The Shirt.  It was too big (I did NOT want to purchase a new one for almost $50, thank you very much), the color was sort of brown/olive/ewwww, and I sort of felt as if it made me feel like a wannabe - a die hard scouter - something I had never planned to be.  

Then one day, as we were starting our den meeting, I stood with my group of 8 year old boys, raised my arm and began to say the Cub Scout Promise, I heard a distant voice echo in my head.  The voice had a beautiful slight southern accent.  The voice said "I Cindy Watson, promise to do my best to do my duty to God and my Country, to help other people, and to obey the law of the pack."

It was the voice of my mother.  A voice that I have not heard in 14 years now.  A voice that I miss tremendously.  And in that moment, I fell in love with The Ugly Brown Shirt.  

I have no tangible memories of my mother being a cub scout leader.  As the mother of 6 boys, it is no surprise that she was one - I was just never a scout, I have had no reason to remember her leading the  small meetings.  

I must have been there, as she repeated that promise with her group of scouts.  I must have been an observer on the sidelines once or twice.  Because I can her her voice in my mind, each time I raise my arm and say to my group of 8 year old scouts, "I, Andra Stowe, promise to do my best............